Saturday, March 29, 2014

Law and Disorder: I am a special victim---of this show!

So I have a new obsession. I know, hello 1998.

Oh, btw, I'm supposed to put pictures in my blog to make it more interesting to look at and stuff. Words are not apparently enough these days.  So here's a picture of the staff of SVU (or of the staff of the season I am currently watching).

Look at us, we are badasses. Crossing arms and shit.

Anyway, it was recently discovered that I am obsessed with detective shows and mysteries. I don't know how this didn't come up before as I have never watched Murder, She Wrote or Magnum P.I., or the Dick Van Dyke show where he's a detective or even, the Mentalist.

But here are the shows I AM obsessed with: Sherlock, X-Files, Lost, Psych, Monk, True Detective, and Breaking Bad. Well, also Six Feet Under and House of Cards but that's a different entry.  The point is, its surprising that I would discover Law and Order: SVU when it is airing its 14th season.

It started back in November. I had just traveled to Kansas, Alabama, Japan, Guam and Los Angeles...in that order. I was in Los Angeles for about 2 days (and really really confused about time) and off I was to Washington DC to do a job in early December.  Since I've been travelling non-stop, I haven't really had time to be jet-lagged.  I landed in DC around 11pm, I get to the hotel around 1am and see an email from the customer saying he wants me to start at 7am.

Say word?


I emailed back and indicated I just got to the hotel and is it possible if I could start at 745am? Luckily, he said 9am was a good time to start. SO, if I start sleeping at 2am, then I can get about 6 hours of sleep. That can be sufficient enough to work.  So, I turn on the tv and hope to go to sleep. On tv, is John Ritter.


And I LOVE John Ritter. He was playing a doctor whose wife had cheated on him and so he was trying to kill the lover's fetus--and of course, I was freaking hooked. John Ritter kills the baby and it turns out...crap! It's his BABY! WHAAAAAAAAAATTTTTTT?!?

So, just when I'm like 'that was a good episode', another episode comes up and it's that guy from Will and Grace.


And I wasn't really paying attention because I was trying to drift off to sleep. Until, near the end of the episode, Eric McCormack turns his daughter in (he was trying to take the heat for his daughter. Apparently, his spawn had a thirst for murder) at the end of the episode. She pleads with him "but daddy, you promised!! you'd do this for me!" and he's like "I know". Then she grabs scissors and stabs him in the neck. He falls to the ground and the ADA blonde chick says "he's dead" and close up to Mariska Hargitay looking like "WTF DUDE" (sp?) and then fade to credit.

I ended up watching 2 more episodes and I finally fell asleep at 5:30am....then my alarmed went at 6am. Oh man, DAMN YOU SVU! After work, I ended up going to bed at 3pm and waking up at 8pm and watching SVU.

The remainder of that week was most of the same: me staying up abnormal hours to watch SVU, then finally falling asleep for like an hour then waking up for work. I would go to work, race back to the hotel room during lunch and sleep for 30 minutes. Go back to work. Finish work around 3pm (the client was a government site and they start and finish their workday super early). Stay up as long as I can. Fall asleep at 4pm and wake up at like, 11pm, just in time for SVU.  I wouldn't be surprised if I started a fight club with all this non-sleeping and SVU watching I was doing.

I finally got on a regular schedule, went home and watched SVU every so often when I couldn't sleep.  It wasn't until I went back to Russia that I got hooked again! Dangit! My shift was 5am -- 5pm in Sochi and the only television we had was NYC's NBC channel (since that was the live feed). So at noon, it's SVU time! And of COURSE, editors needed help whenever the murderer was caught. The timing is uncanny. I made my work partner, Andy, watch SVU with me. I was hoping he would be hooked and I could feel less guilty about SVU.

Why do I feel guilty about SVU? Because a lot of it is ridiculous in the most-unridiculous network television type of way. The murderer is on the west side? Sure. We'll be there in 5 minutes. Traffic doesn't exist on SVU.  The trial? Its always part 38 or 26 of the trial when we hit a confession or some sort or the ADA is being ridiculous about something. Or how about when those credits come at a time when you're like "WTF did I just watch?" There was one episode where an avatar was raping another avatar.  The creator of the game (I think it was a take on SIMS) had to make the sun rise in 5 minutes to find the cabin where the avatar was being raped so we could find the real life person who was the avatar. I know, WHAT?! My boyfriend and I looked at each other and was like "my brain imploded".

Oh yeah, now I watch like 4 episodes before I go to bed on netflix. If I'm on the road (like I am now), it's ipad/netflix/svu time.

My most most favorite thing about this show is Ice-T.  He facial expressions ALWAYS mirror my facial expressions on the show.  He's like "you're telling me this rapist like to eat dog hair?" and I'm like "you're telling me that Ice-T is telling me he has to investigate a rapist who likes to eat dog hair?"

I'm going to get that rapist who likes to rape armpits. ROAR.

Anyway, it's time for me to download that CHA-CHUNG sound effect for my phone and watch Meloni beat bad guys up, Mariska convince a kid to talk, ADA blonde person (although in the most recent episode, she dyed it red. What's going on Casey?) be mad, the Asian psych guy to be super calm and controlled and the autopsy woman with great hair be like "um, yeah. He mutilated her eyebrows".  

This show is comedy gold. And I love it.


Awww shiz. Things are about to. go. down.

Friday, March 28, 2014

Being a fat girl is hard work

An almost year long absence....and yet, I still got 2 page views today. Whaaa?

I have another post brewing about why I was away for so long, but this article annoyed me so much that I felt I needed to vent about it.

So, on  my facebook timeline, this "inspiring story" has gone viral, if you want to call it inspiring. UGH. I can't stand it. I'll explain why, but here's a little back-story.

I have struggled with weight for almost my entire life.  It started with a traumatic event when I was a child and was exacerbated when I tried to 'fit in' in elementary school.  In the 4th grade, I LOVED running, I LOVED bike-riding, I loved Ghostbusters, I loved the boy next door, then video games, then the magazine Highlights....in that order. Whenever we had gym class, I couldn't wait to race the boys. I would always come in either second or third place (there's this one guy I could never beat).  But it was like this: guy, guy, me, guy, guy, guy, guy, guy....then all the girls, then some guy and girl stragglers.  The guys would make fun of me (as guys wont to do) but girls would never talk to me. One day, I just figured out that I was just too tomboyish. So, to be more 'girly' I started running slower and slower so I could hang out with the girls. Well, that didn't work because they were always interested in things that had nothing to do with biking, video games or ghostbusters. In retrospect, I was doomed with girls to begin with. This actually makes me somewhat weepy thinking about it.

Anyway, so rejected by girls, guy who I'm going to marry who lived next door (he claimed to be my Skywalker to his Leia.  Imagine my surprise when I found out they were brother and sister. Sigh) moved to the Philippines, and the girl down the street that I would bike-ride with moved to Texas, that coupled with an event that reminded me of my aforementioned traumatic event and I gained about 50 pounds from 4th grade to the 5th grade. The school pictures don't lie yo.

My parents were dismayed by my abnormal weight gain and as such, they tried to chastise me so it would give me motivation to lose weight. All it did was depress me more and I was prone to more reclusion.  We moved to a new neighborhood where other girls came over and actually wanted to be friends. We were like the multi-racial sitcom---I was the chubby Asian/Pacific Islander, Missy was the Mexican, Candace (Candy) was the white chick and Leela was the black girl down the road (she was the one I was closest to).  Obviously, names have been made up to protect the guilty.  Hanging out with these girls and going out to do stuff (Let's...uh...walk up this hill. Let's go swimming. Let's go do this...) made me naturally lose weight.  I remember one time, I was a size 5 for like 20 minutes...until I drank some water...then I was like a tight size 5 or a comfy size 7.

ANYWAY, those girls moved away, here comes high school and even though I was like, 110 pounds, my girlfriends were like 85--90--100 pounds, so I'm a montrous heffer compared to these girls.  However, I was also unusually tall.  In real life, I'm only 5'3", but going to a predominantly Asian school, the average height is 5'0.  Put it this way, I was in drill team and the all the tall people were placed in the back. I was in row 4 out 5...that's how "tall" I was in comparison to the other girls. I also had boobs that people made fun of (it's really vogue for a lot of Asian guys to date A or B cups and I was already two letters ahead of those folks). So no boyfriends for me and a lot of fat jokes -- from family, friends, and enemies I suppose. I was automatically an enemy to pretty popular people. Actually, I would have preferred they ignored me rather than give me the stink-eye. I also did not have a lot of money so it was the same 5 outfits recycled to the popular girls' 50 outfits.  Everyone knew, once I was finally able to afford cool clothes---because they were on sale---it was now the most uncool stuff.

This is not to say I didn't have ANY friends but let's just say these are words I  did not hear: pretty, skinny or smart.  Words I did hear: funny, weird, fat, photogenic (I apparently could smile like a mofo in pictures).  As with everyone, if I were to go back and have the mind I have today but have the body I had then, I would DEMOLISH everyone because there's no need to be such assholes to people like me.

But I digress.

So with this background, weight has always been big big factor in my life.  Every other year I'm the fattest person on the planet or I'm 'looking good' cause I shed some pounds. I always shed the same amount of weight --between 20-35 pounds...and I always gain all the weight back.

Now, why do I gain the weight back?

A number of factors: I hate exercise.  This is not to say I won't do it, because every other year, I exercise my butt off.  In 2012, I ran 2 half marathons (I have run a total of 6 half marathons, 1 10k and 1 5k to date) and an Olympic Distance triathalon. I'm not going to lie--the training for the triathalon is brutal and so is running--or shuffling as I like to do it.  I don't find it fun but I like to cross things off of my bucket list, so Jesus help me I'm going to finish a triathalon (and I've had naysayers that I couldn't do it. My boyfriend being one of them.  Thanks boyfriend! In his defense, he says I miscontrued his comment. He says that he could never do a triathlon. If HE couldn't do a triathalon (and he's a swimmer), how could I do a triathlon (and I don't know how to swim).  I think of doing another tri but I think of all the misery of training and I can't bring myself to go back there. Maybe if I had an equally miserable training buddy.

I love food: and I'm not talking junk food. I'm talking a lot of different foods, but some of it is junky. Lately, it's all been junky, to be honest. But I love going out to restaurants, I like trying out things, I like going out with other people who love food.  When I go on a diet, I am miserable. The misery comes from having to plan things out--and if somebody comes in from out of town, I've had a 14 hour work-day, if I'm traveling--forget planning, I'm going to eat what's convenient.  But what happens? All that organic food I've purchased has rotted in my refrigerator.  Luckily, a lot of food I like is somewhat healthy -- i love fish, chicken, roasted veggies (ok, really it's asparagus, cauliflower, mushrooms and brussel sprouts...how the heck do you spell brussell sprouts?) but I also love fried chicken and french fries. More the chicken than the fries. And white rice---the food demon of all demons. Doubly sigh.

I have a slow metabolism: I did a 'diet' where I would eat pretty healthily and I would do a 'taste' of something bad. Typically this means, I take a bite out of my boyfriend's stuff. One bite of his cookie. One bite of his chicken. One bite of his piece of chocolate.  He's always baffled about how hard it is for me to lose weight because in his words "you eat like 2 things" (which also makes me miserable).  However, this is a bad comparison as my boyfriend as a metabolism of a squirrel and can eat a package of cookies and gain like 2 pounds, where if I did the same thing (if I could), I would gain 10 pounds. But that's also I'm a lady with boobs.


I tend to be disappointed with results: I'm grew up in a strict Asian household. So when I'm not looking like fit mom, writing award winning feature length films, consciously coupling in my $1,000 yoga pants, I tend to beat myself up and think what the point is. I know, I know. It's about the journey. But when you've spent a year training for 2 half marathons and a triathalon and giving up salt (that is HARD), Diet Coke, alcohol and red meat...I should look like Fit Mom or Cobie Smulders.  I just look like a regular somewhat chubby person instead of a skinny/toned person.

So when I lose a ton of weight --- hating my exercise and hating my food --- I become a very reclusive and miserable person.  I do this for 3 -- 6 months and then I'm like SCREW this and I go back to being lazy and fat and somewhat happier than I was before. At least in fatter clothes, I can see my friends and my head isn't whacked out in calorie count.  When I'm in losing weight mode, I typically make an excuse to not see my friends so I won't be tempted to eat Hooter's Wings (I lose this battle 70% of the time, though, because I don't have a lot of friends).

SOOOO, the point of this backstory is:

1. We fatties are not always drinking beer and binging at 2am. Ask almost all my roommates.
2. Calling me fatty is not inspiring. Especially after I swam a mile, ridden a bike for 20 miles or so (I forget, I just remember chafing) and running for over 6 miles. Calling me an inspirational fatty makes me want to kick you in the face.
3. I don't say "Hey asshole. Thanks for being a jerk to that waiter and showing us wussies on how to lay the smackdown on bad service."
4. Only fatties can call each other fatties. It is only through the misery of being a fattie do you deserve to call other fatties.
5. Fatties can't hide.  Assholes and dumbasses can hide behind with a beautiful exterior...but not for loooong.
6. Fatter fatties cannot judge skinnier fatties for not being fat and miserable enough. Jesus, my friend Lanie is like 120 pounds and 5'8 (something like that). She gained FIVE pounds and guys at work gave her shit for it. I'm gaining like a crapload more than that, so I'm sure I'm getting lots of behind the back crap about it.
7. Inspirational stories are not inspirational if you are judging me on how I got fat in the first place. (It's not like fat people are like "Oooooh...I'm too skinny and pretty. Let's get fat! Give me those fries at 3am and lots and lots of lard!! PARTY!!!")
8. Can you tell that this "inspirational story" really pissed me off?

Anyway, so here's your local fat girl (and yes, this is a 'skinny' year, and I am pumped to find some new exercise I'm going to hate. I know, bad attitude but, seriously, I'm kind of excited because my boyfriend has decided to be miserable with me!) We're going to try yoga, hiking and aquatic exercise this round. In fact, next week, we are both taking a "HEALTH-VACATION" (I don't know why I felt the need to put that in caps) where all we focus is on no work, eating healthy, and finding interesting exercises. We really need to do it at a time-off basis. We're finding that trying to do it while you have work and dogs and such is too frustrating, so we're doing a health-vacation reset...starting this Sunday! WHEEEEEE.

However, I will leave this post on a positive note.  Here is a TRUE inspirational story.  It's one best friend trying to help his best friend to lose weight.

FIN BITCHES.

P.S. Man, I am sassy tonight. I blame Chicago's freezing temperatures for cooping me up in this hotel room.

Thursday, July 11, 2013

My Secret Talent


“The trouble with being in the rat race is that even if you win, you're still a rat.” --Lily Tomlin


I'm sort of going through a quarter-life plus 10 years crisis.  A few months ago, I came to the "epiphany" that I was in the wrong career field and doing the wrong job.  I have been having these thoughts for many years now but I was too enticed by the money to have the balls to quit.  One day, after a slew of emails (that I typically respond with a politically correct solution), I just decided I have had it.  Here is a sample of my responses: 

"Dear xxx,
Putting your email in all capitals is inappropriate. If you had followed the process that you blatantly ignored, your crisis would not be happening"

"Dear xxx,
If you treated your people a little better, maybe they would stop leaving your team"

"Dear xxx,
Isn't is nice that you are blaming me for not doing something, when in essence, it is YOUR job to do in the first place?"

"Dear xxx,
Please find a new person to head this project. I have put in my resignation."


After about a few of those emails, I had talked to my significant other about leaving the business all together.  Bless him, he said "I just want you to be happy. Do it".  So I put in my resignation and my soul (if souls exist) let out a big sigh.  

However, I still need money, so I am freelancing.  I calculated that if I did 1-2 jobs a month, I should be able to contribute to the household appropriately. I did have to give up some things like expensive shampoos and my once-a-month massage habit but I think it was well-worth it.  So, it's been about 2 months since I've resigned.

Now what?

I decided to take some classes at things I thought I would be good at---a bunch of improv classes and some sketch writing classes. I mean, I like comedy and I like writing. Will they like me back? It's too early to tell at this point, but my secret fantasy was that I would be so AWESOME and my secret talent would come seeping through my skin that it was a big question mark as to why I never pursued improv and/or sketch writing in the first place.  Alas, that did not happen.  I turned out to be somewhat funny in sketch writing and just okay at improv. (Side note: It didn't help that one of the improv classes I hated because it felt so "actory" and cliquey and...young!)  I think that is my biggest problem, that I just want to be able to pick up something and become the savant that the world has been waiting for.  However, I think I can be good at improv/sketch if I just kept doing it, so there's that.

Unfortunately, I feel just like everyone else. Ordinary. A little bit better at some things than other people, a little bit worse (or a lot worse) than other people.  A lot of things I have done, I just plain suck at.  Like, triathalon training? I suck. Singing? I can't hold a tune. Sign language? I got the alphabet down.  I keep taking these classes in hopes that something will hit me over the head and say "this is what you are meant to do".

The closest thing I can think of, that I might be good at, is writing.  But, I have such a hard time with coming up with cool ideas, funny premises and interesting stories that I just don't think I have the ability to pull it off.  

I wrote a bunch of sketches for a class, that thankfully, the class laughed at.  It felt REALLY good when my teacher laughed at it.  But, I still keep thinking--what can I do with this? Where can I go with this? Is it too crazy for me to pursue this?  The thought that kills me is What if I'm not really that good and I'm just trying to convince myself otherwise?

Right now, I'm feeling like the main character in a book called "A Spell for Chameleon".  In the book,  at a certain age, everyone in the land of Xanth has a special power.  Bink (I think that was his name, I read this in high school) just didn't seem to have one and for years, they thought of him as this talentless being.  He was even thinking "Oh god, if I could just make something from yellow to green, at least that would be SOMETHING". Anyway, it turns out in the book that he is actually a powerful magician and his talent is that he cannot be harmed by magic (which is concealed by making it look like he escapes danger by luck or coincidence).  Long story short, it took forever for Bink to figure it out because his talent was concealing itself in order to make him less vulnerable to non-magic attacks.  But, what comes to mind to me is that, in all those years he thought he didn't have a talent, it must've been kind of lame being Bink.

I'm hoping that's my problem. I just can't see what I'm good at and it'll reveal itself at some point in time.  If I find out, I'm just average at everything then...it's just really going to suck to be me.


Thursday, June 6, 2013

Watchful Wednesday: Season 1 free-for-all

I actually was going to do a post on Sherlock Holmes and do a compare and contrast between Benedict Cumberbatch's Holmes, to Jonny Lee Miller's Homes to Robert Downey Jr's Holmes to a Jeremy 1990s Holmes but I fell asleep during 'Sherlock Holmes: The Game of Shadows'.  That doesn't sound/look good for Guy Ritchie, but I'm determined to get through all this to write a comprehensive essay about Holmes (and I haven't read the books) so I'm going to try to hit that deadline next week.

What I am going to talk about is Season 1 of a bunch of shows I have just watched.  I haven't had cable or Netflix for about 9 months so I have a lot of catching up to do.  Here is what I have seen so far:

Season 1 of Arrested Development
Season 1 of The League
Season 1 of Dexter
Season 1 of Homeland
Season 1 of Portlandia
Season 1/2 of Whose Line is it Anyway (Brit version....this doesn't get really good until Ryan Stiles joins the show)
Season 1 of Scandal

Out of all of them, I think my favorite one is Homeland.  My least favorite is probably The League...but that's not saying much because I still enjoyed The League. However, I kind of dread having to go through ALL of these to get to Season 2.  Also, the boyfriend is plowing through Lost (he's up to Season 5) and wants to plow through Fringe (although, I must say, I was somewhat disappointed with the last season of Fringe) so there is a LOT of television going on in the household.  Luckily, I'm on sabbatical (with 5 more days left before I go back to work) so I need to binge asap while I still have the opportunity.  I would have to say that the habit of binge watching started during two phases in my life: when I had no friends in high school and they would have those stupid Real World marathons on MTV and when I was in college and spent Thanksgivings by myself---but there was an X-Files marathon on TNT or A&E or something like that.

But, back to watching seasons. Instead of going on to Season 2, I'm still have a bunch more Season 1's to go through.  The list is as follows:

Season 1 of Game of Thrones (I've watched 1 episode thus far)
Season 1 of Mr. Show (I've watched 1 episode so far)
Season 1 of Sons of Anarchy (no episodes watched)
Season 1 of The Wire (one episode so far)
Season 1 of Seinfeld (I know, I know....I've only watched a few episodes after coming home drunk from a party)
Season 1 of The Newsroom
Season 1 of Community

and THEN there are shows I haven't even finished! The list is as follows:

Friends (I stopped watching at Season 6 when I went to college)
X-Files (I stopped watching at Season 7 when I went to college)
South Park (I stopped watching at Season 5 and watched intermittent episodes since college)
Grey's Anatomy (Stopped at Season 5. I was kind of tired of the McDreamy/Grey love affair I think)

Lastly, the shows I am currently in the middle of:

America's Got Talent (because of Howard Stern)
The Voice (I don't know why I watch this. Mostly to see Adam Levin and Blake Shelton I think)
Real Time with Bill Maher
The Daily Show
Masterchef
Psych
Inside Amy Schumer
Breaking Bad

Hmmm....interesting, the shows I am currently watching are mostly reality or topical shows.

Damn, I wish 1. that I got paid to watch television and 2. I burned calories while watching television. I should probably get like an elliptical while watching these things.

Lastly, just to give you a taste of what kind of television I like, here are my top 5 favorite shows, that I finished in no particular order:

1. Six Feet Under
2. Lost
3. Fringe
4. The Cosby Show
5. Monk

Crap, the WGA just released the best written television shows of all time and Sopranos is number 1.  Now, I have to watch Sopranos? Argh! The things you do to be a master of the craft.

Do you think there is any television I am missing or do I have all the big ones covered? Please tell me I do, I'm going to start getting Sean Bean confused.  Also, I hope they have a game show regarding topical television shows, I would KILL that show.

I'm going to watch Jimmy Kimmel Live now. Heh.

Wednesday, June 5, 2013

Topical Tuesday: Seriously, those two guys didn't know what was going on?

A few weeks ago, Charles Ramsay (most refreshing interview ever) found little girls trapped and held captive by Ariel Castro.  What I don't get from this story is that Ariel Castro was living with two guys (his brothers I believe) and the two guys claim they never knew what was going on in the TEN FREAKING YEARS Ariel Castro was doing this.

Seriously?

I have only lived with my boyfriend for about 5 years and that dude cannot hide shit from me, let alone try to hide PEOPLE from me.  My boyfriend tried to hide cookies from me (he was trying to go on a diet and he hid in a high cabinet, somewhere that I don't go very often because I'm short and/or need a ladder to reach said cookies) and it didn't work. You know why? Because he had crumbs all over the place. Granted, he's not a criminal by any means but if he's having a hard time hiding COOKIES, imagine trying to hide a person. Not even a person, THREE WOMEN! One of whom had a miscarriage.

What. THE. EFF.

I call bullshit on those two guys who claim 'they never knew what was going on.' Perhaps if it was in another house, MAYBE, I might believe in their claims but in the same HOUSE? Yeah, right.  They guys are just as guilty as Castro. Even if they didn't do any abuse to their girls, their knowledge of their existence in the house means they are approving of Castro's behavior.  I hope they get the crap they deserve.

What do you think?

On a different note, I love this song and this music video. Although when it went to black at the end of the music, I was like "is that the end?" Very Soprano-like of them.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ktvTqknDobU

The End.

Tuesday, June 4, 2013

Pseudo midlife (?) crisis (??)

So, I kind of had a pseudo midlife crisis.  Although, what really counts as midlife? Should I say, I just had a pseudo crisis?

Anyway, I've mentioned in the past that I would like to pursue writing but am extremely terrified to do it.  Instead, for the past decade, I've been chasing money in a career that I am fairly good at but not super passionate about.  Don't get me wrong, I always want to do a great job and I have a high work ethic but there's a part of me that feels that I could possibly have a career in something where I feel my soul is being nourished.

A bunch of different events happened which led up to me taking a 6 week sabbatical from work.  Mostly to figure out what I want to do (I have a very understanding workplace) and where I want to go.  I decided to give a valiant effort to writing and just finished a script deadline for a production company the other day.  Now, if I get to the next stage, I figure it may mean I might have a chance at this.  I've also decided to enter two other writing contests: one for female comedy writers and another soliciting a bunch of shorts. So, the opportunities are there, it's up to me to go after them.

In the meantime, I do have one BIG problem with writing. It's starting to write. I tend to procrastinate and pace and ponder and freak out about what I'm going to write. I'm not sure why. Kind of how I feel about going to the gym. I hate going to the gym but once, I'm there, I'm glad I'm there and I feel a million times better that I went.  Same with writing, I hate having to start writing (mostly because I think I'll be spewing crap--like the crap I spewing on this blog at this moment) but once I get into it, I find myself writing for a few hours or so.

So, in an effort to keep myself motivated to writing, I've decided to write in this blog 5x a week, like a job, to give me a warm up to start writing my shorts/scripts/pilots.  To make it easier on myself, I'm going to give a general topic for each day of the week.

Hence my daily to-write topics:
Monday: Manic Mondays -- I will write about stuff I hate
Tuesday: Topical Tuesdays -- This will be about something that is current or in the news
Wednesday: Watch-it Wednesdays -- a review or an observation about a movie or tv show I watched since I'm obsessed with film and television
Thursday: Throwback Thursdays -- a story from my past
Friday: Fictional Friday -- a fictional short story, poem (in case I get lazy), anecdote, statement

I wish I could draw on the internet (maybe I can try on my Surface Pro, something I got to be a 'real writer' but mostly to 'look like' a 'real writer' more than anything, then I would draw something awesome, but you're going to have to settle for my words.

Anyway, I shall start with Manic Mondays, today. After I walk around and think and panic about writing for a bit.

Enjoy!

Tuesday, October 9, 2012

I'm losing my edge

And I swear, I'm not going through lady times.  I think the distance betwixt myself and my boyfriend is starting to bother me.  The last time I saw him was August 19th.  We went to a wedding in Napa (so awesome) and then he flew away.

Reasons why I'm losing my edge (edginess. Yes, I do think I have some 'edge'.  Not to the point I can call myself "The Edge" but enough edginess to nick you while you're shaving).


  • I watched Titanic
  • I watched Titanic and totally bawled even before Jack died because I knew he was going to die.
  • Did I mention I never cried the first time I saw Titanic (this would be my second viewing.  I always though it was too long to ever watch again)
  • I watched Love Actually
  • I felt really bad for Laura Linney's character.  Paulo was hot! (And never realized it was Paulo from Lost till this second viewing)
  • I was obsessed with finding out if Alan Rickman's character actually physically cheated on Emma Thompson's character and read 123 posts about it on imdb
  • I was rocking out to "You are the woman that I've always dreamed of" by Firefall today
  • I was tempted to watch Titanic for a third time today.  I opted for watching The Adjustment Bureau instead
  • I started crying to Sia's song "Breathe" because it reminded of the Six Feet Under finale that I saw in 2006. That was SIX YEARS AGO.
  • I can't wait for my next turn on Words With Friends even though I have like 15 games going on
  • I've watched 4 movies in the theaters in the past month.  One day, I saw two movies back to back. (Well, this might give me some edge back.  Watching movies solo is somewhat edgy)
  • I shaved my legs.  But I'm Asian/Pacific Islander and really have no hair on my legs but used it as an excuse to take a bath and pass the time for an hour
  • I haven't watched television for 2 weeks
  • I ate salmon today. What a boring meal.
  • I haven't had wine in like, a month

Ok.  Reasons that I am still somewhat edge and cancels out my non-edginess


  • Watched Looper by myself and bought a popcorn to eat by myself
  • Watched The Master by myself and DID NOT join Scientology although if I had an hour more of Phillip Seymour Hoffman, I may have joined the cult
  • Watched End of Watch and cried silently so nobody would know
  • Well, I guess you know now, I just told you
  • I ran a half marathon on Labor Day even though I only trained 3 days for it
  • I limped all through Disneyland the day after my race because I didn't want to waste my 80 dollar ticket
  • I was TEMPTED to get a wheelchair at Disneyland but DIDN'T
  • I purchased a 50 lb plasma tv and set that bitch up myself (using a furniture dolly to get it from my car to the apartment)
  • Traveled across the country in 3 days with 2 dogs and a tall boyfriend
  • I can wax without crying now (you think these eyebrows are naturally this way? think again)
  • I haven't ironed my shirts in 2 weeks
  • I've done 2 half marathons and 1 triathalon in this YEAR alone
  • I'm reading The Book of Basketball by Bill Simmons. EDGY!
  • I listen to Overtime with Bill Maher podcasts. Podcasts are EDGY!
  • I ate at Animal and had braised rabbit legs, chicken liver toast and pig ear
  • I was sitting next to Aziz Ansari and Eric from Eric and something show, great job. (Wait, I think that makes me non-edge. Anything doing with celebrities makes me lame)
  • I accidentally walked into the lot where they were shooting Arrested Development
  • Came in 4th place out of 40 at California Trivia Night (this shows how much easier trivia night is easier on the west coat than the east coast)
  • I posted a picture comparing myself to a rhino trying to be a unicorn
  • I went to a comedy club by myself to watch a friend, and actually ran into ANOTHER friend from college


Ok. Although my edge list seems to outdo my non-edgy list, I think each thing on my edge list is like 1 point whereas each thing on my non-edgy list mentioning CRYING, BAWLING or TITANIC is worth 10 points.

Damn.  Hurry up boyfriend and get to California.  I'm starting to become a lame-ass girlfriend who may become needy. NOOOOOOO!!!!!! I mean, I'm starting to watch sad movies with romance in it. I'm like two steps away from watching something with Kate Hudson in it.